What Is It to Be a Man?

*Photo credit

The first time I cross dressed, it was Halloween. I wasn’t an especially attractive man. The clothes I had were not what I would have chosen: a pair of jeans that were too big and a baggy t-shirt.  I spent a lot of time applying my beard. It looked scraggly, but real.

Dried spirit gum pulled and cracked under the pube-like crepe hair it secured to my face as I smiled at myself in the mirror.  I looked like a dork, my long hair back in a ponytail with a ball cap over it. I was short and I had no style.

There was something thrilling about it anyway. I didn’t look how I wanted to look, and yet, there was a part of myself I could see that had never been seen before. My heart beat a little faster under the elastic bandages that dug…

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